My NFL Cards Pile-Up Disaster
So last Sunday I dragged out my massive box of 2023 Panini NFL cards – been stacking ’em since preseason. Pack wrappers flying everywhere, sticky from spilled coffee nearby! Shook the whole dang box upside down on the living room carpet. Cards exploded like confetti near the TV stand. Found three white boxes hiding under the couch later too. Total chaos man.
Sorting Like a Squirrel
Started scooping cards into giant piles by team names. Lions here, Bengals there. Dropped half the Packers when my cat jumped on the table – hissed at Aaron Rodgers’ rookie card! Smacked my knee crawling after Chiefs cards under the coffee table. Then came the real headache: alphabetizing players in each team pile. Finger tracing names muttering “A is for Adams… Davante Adams? Adams Davante?” Brain melted trying to remember if rookie QBs went before kickers.
Ditched the stacks eventually – grabbed three empty shoeboxes instead:
- Busted Box 1: Dumped AFC East squads inside. Bills, Dolphins, Jets, Patriots – all swimming together.
- Trashed Box 2: NFC West crash-landed here. Found 49ers quarterback cards stuck to old gum wrappers.
- Last Ugly Box: AFC North teams crammed tight. Steelers defense literally crushing Ravens offense cards.
Pen & Paper Saved My Butt
Opened a rumpled notebook from college algebra class – flipped past calculus nightmares. Scribbled team names with a leaky pen at the top of each page. Went pack-by-pack down the messy stacks:
- Stabbed pen through paper counting Dolphins receivers
- Crossed out names in pencil when I dug out duplicate Browns players
- Spilled soda on Titans checklist – ink blurred everywhere
Made tick marks til the pages looked like tiger stripes. No fancy spreadsheets, just chicken scratch numbers screaming “how many Jets players exist?!”. Dropped the notebook twice chasing loose cards.
The Frankenstein Checklist Lives
After three hours wrestling cardboard and paper cuts? Slammed the notebook shut. My “master checklist” is just team pages with:
- Blue pen smears
- Erased holes from changing counts
- Soda stains shaped like Florida
- Stray Parmesan crumbs stuck to Vikings list
Final slapdash system: Shoe boxes by division on the shelf, beat-up notebook jammed between Packer & Bears stacks. Now at least I know where to find Texans rookies (under leftover pizza napkins in Box 1). High-fived myself & kicked card scraps under the couch. Done.
